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Karen and Ken Poyner

 

Constant Animals

42 unruly fictions

 

 

Paperback, 142 pages

 

or

 

e-book, approximately 90 pages

 

A man who worries he may not be capable of spurring his mermaid wife to conceive.?A class of birds conflicted in their relationship with their kindred feathered overlords.?A woman whose breasts suddenly abandon her.?A man who confuses his wife with his girlfriend, when the two are delivered by the shipping company on the same day.? A chicken, who, even after partaking of the free snacks at the local bar, proves he is still no good at holding his alcohol.

 

Ken Poynerís fiction and poetry has appeared in such diverse places as The Alaska Quarterly Review, Poet Lore, Asimovís Science Fiction, Corium, Menacing Hedge, The Legendary, Full of Crow, and dozens of other print and digital venues.?He has been nominated for three Pushcart Prizes, and taught on a National Endowment for the Arts Community Teaching Fellowship.?He resides in southeastern Virginia, with his power-lifter wife and various house animals.

 

Paperback:?Amazon or one of the bookstores listed below.? (List price: $13.00)

 

E-book format for the Kindle (MOBI):?Amazon or Smashwords.?(List price:? $4.99)

 

E-book for other devices (EPUB):?Barnes and Noble, Kobo, Diesel Ebooks, Smashwords.?(List price $4.99)

 

E-book for Apple devices: iTunes.?(List price: $4.99)

 

 

(At Smashwords only, enter coupon code FB24B and get the ebook (MOBI or EPUB) for $2.99.)

 

 

Available at Kosmic Khameleon on Pleasure House Road in Virginia Beach, Virginia and at Sundial Books on Main Street in Chincoteague, Virginia.

 

 

If you do not have an e-reader, Amazon offers a downloadable free MOBI reader for the PC; Adobe offers the free, downloadable ADE 2.0 for EPUB format e-books.

 

If you enjoy the book, please consider writing a review on the vendorís site, or at "Goodreads", or some similar content rating site.

 

 

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Writing Links

 

 

Some of Kenís recent work available on the web:

 

Fiction:?"The Reason", "Creating the Best Children", "Our Monkeys", from the Journal of Microliterature

 

Fiction: "The Alliance", from Negative Suck

 

Fiction:?"The Peacemakers", "The Traveler", "Overreach", "The Spouse", from The Legendary

 

Poetry: The Gatherer of Children, from Frigg

 

Poetry:?Democracy, from Frigg

 

Poetry:?The Companion, from Full of Crow

 

Poetry:?The Next Glory, from Conte

 

 

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Contact Information

 

 

 

If any link fails to work, or you encounter other problems, please let Ken know by clicking here to send an e-mail:?Web Contact.

 

If you care to be placed on my Readers list ?a group e-mail list to which I e-mail links connecting to my new work coming out on the Internet ?just e-mail me at Ken Poyner with the request, and I will start sending you notice when any Internet based magazine has put out new work of mine.

 

And to just e-mail me for no particular reason:? ken@kpoyner.com.

 

 

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Powerlifting

 

 

Karen has been stubbornly married to Ken since 1977.? After years of bodybuilding, she moved into power lifting ?to become one of the all time great women in the sport.? Some of her accomplishments are listed below.

 

 

Titles Won

 

Bodybuilding

1991 USNFA Eastern Natural, Women's Open

1994 GDFA Nationals, Women's Open

1996 NABF Judgement Day in Latrobe, Women's Masters

1997 NABF Hazleton Supernatural, Women's Masters

1998 AAU Chesapeake Open Bodybuilding Championships, Women's Masters

1998 NGA Potomac Cup, Women's Open Lightweight, Women's Open Overall

1999 AAU Colonial Open, Women's Masters

1999 NGA Mount Rogers, Women's Open Lightweight

2000 NGA Potomac Cup, Women's Masters

2000 ANBA Cinnaminson Shredfest, Women's Masters, Women's Open Lightweight

2001 INBF Mid-Atlantic Regional, Women's Masters 40+, Women's Open Lightweight, Women's Overall

2001 Steele Jungle Asheville Supernatural, Women's Open Lightweight

2002 INBF Atlantic Coast Natural, Women's Masters 45+

2002 Steele Jungle Asheville Supernatural, Women's Open Lightweight

2002 INBF Presidential Cup, Women's Open Lightweight

Powerlifting

2004 USAPL Mid-Atlantic Powerlifting/Bench Press, 45-49 105 Powerlifting (475) and Bench (130), Open 105 Powerlifting (475) and Bench (130)

2004 100% RAW Powerlifting Federation World Bench Press, Open and 45-49 Bench Press (120), World and Va. State Records

2004 USAPL Va. State, Open and 45-49 Bench Press (130), Va. State Masters 45-49 105 class record

2005 100% RAW Powerlifting Federation National Champion Women's 105 lbs class, Powerlifting and Bench Press, Open and Masters 45-49 world record 160 squat, 125 bench and 220 deadlift, Best Lifter Powerlifting and Bench

2005 USAPL National Bench Press Championships, winner 105 lbs Open and Masters 45-49 and RAW, 57.5 kg National Meet Record (masters 45-49)

2005 USAPL Nation's Capital Cup, winner Women's 105 Masters 45-49 Powerlifting and Bench, and Best Lifter both powerlifting and bench, state record 180 squat, 130 bench, state record 230 deadlift, state record 540 total (masters 45-49 105 class).

2006 USAPL National Bench Press Championships (Denver - March), winner 105 lbs Masters 50-54 and RAW, 57.5 kg National Meet Record

2006 USAPL National Bench Press Championships (Charlotte - September) winner 105 lbs Masters 50-54 and RAW, 57.5 kg

2006 IPF World Masters Bench Press, (Miami), 105 lbs Master 2 (50-59) 4th place, 55 kg.

2006 USAPL Capital Cup (Washington, DC), 105 lbs Master 50-59 1st place powerlifting, 1st place bench, best lifter, best bencher

2006 WABDL SunCoast Classic, (Jacksonville, Fla), 105 lbs Master 47-53, 1st place deadlift (world record), 1st place bench

2006 100% RAW World Bench Press Championships (Currituck, NC) 105 lbs Master 50-54 and Open, 1st place (both world records)

2007 100% RAW Ironman Nationals (Stanardsville, Va) 105 lbs Master 50-54, 1st place

2007 100% RAW Deadlift Nationals (Stanardsville, Va) 105 lbs Master 50-54 and Open, 1st place (both world records)

2007 100% RAW United States Bench Press, (Stanardsville, Va) 105 lbs Master 50-54 and Open, 1st place

2007 WABDL United We Stand, (Newcastle, Pa.) 105 lbs Master 47-53 and 105 lbs Open 1st bench press and 1st deadlift (world record) and best deadlifter

2007 WABDL World Championships (Anaheim, Ca) 105 lbs Open 3rd Bench, 105 lbs Open 47-53 1st Bench, 105 lbs Open and Masters 47-53 1st deadlift

2008 USAPL Virginia Open (Stanardsville) 48kg RAW powerlifting open and Masters 50-54 Raw 1st

2008 World Natural Powerlifting Federation (WNPF) RAW Nationals (Ephrata, Pa.) 48 kg powerlifting Open and Masters 50-54 1st, 50-54 bench 1st, and Best Lifter

2008 USAPL Raw Nationals (St, Louis), 48kg powerlifting Open and Masters 50-54 1st place

2008 WABDL United We Stand (Beaver Falls, Pa.) 105 lbs Master 47-53 1st benchpress, 1st deadlift (world record 277.7 lbs), best deadlifter

2009 Arnold Classic, (Columbus, Oh.), no age/no weight class powerlifting, 7th place by Wilks

2009 100% RAW Masters Nationals (Zions Crossroads, Va.) 105 lbs Master 50-54 1st Powerlifting

2009 USAPL Raw Nationals (Charlottesville, Va.) 48kg Open and Masters 50-54 1st powerlifting

2009 WABDL United We Stand (Beaver Falls, Pa.) 105 lbs Master 47-53 1st benchpress, 1st deadlift (world record 286.5 lbs), best benchpresser, best deadlifter

2009 WNPF Worlds (Atlantic City, NJ) 105 lbs Masters 50-59, 1st Raw powerlifting, 1st Raw bench, Best female lifter (World Masters 50-59 record 193 lbs Squat, 126 lbs bench, 253 lbs deadlift, 573 lbs total)

2010 100% Raw Iron Man Nationals, Master 50-54 1st

2010 USAPL Richmond Open (Mechanicsville, Va.) 48kg Open and Masters 50-54 1st Raw Powerlifting (American Open and masters 50-54 record deadlift 122.5 kg and total 265kg, American masters 50-54 record squat 85kg)

2010 WABDL Great Lakes Open (Lansing, Mi.) 48kg Masters 54-60 1st benchpress, 1st deadlift (world record 286.5 lbs), best benchpresser

2010 USAPL Virginia State (Gordonsville, Va.) 48kg Open and Masters 50-54, 1st Raw powerlifting (American Open and masters 50-54 record squat 92.5kg, deadlift 125kg and total 275kg)

2011 USAPL Deadlift Nationals, Master 55-59, 1st

2011 100% Raw Iron Man Nationals, Master 55-59 1st

2011 100% Raw American Challenge, Master 55-59 1st

2012 100% Raw Iron Man Nationals, Master 55-59 1st

2013 100% Raw Mid-Atlantic Championship, Master 55-59 1st?

2013 USAPL American Open (King of Prussia, Pa.) 48 kg Masters 55-59 Raw, 1st

 

Current Records (01/01/2014)


United States of America Power Lifting (USAPL)

Open American Records

?span style='mso-spacerun:yes'>?Raw Squat, 203.5 lbs, Gordonsville 2010

?span style='mso-spacerun:yes'>?Raw Deadlift, 275.5 lbs, Gordonsville 2010

?span style='mso-spacerun:yes'>?Raw Total, 605.25 lbs, St. Gordonsville 2010

Masters 45-49 105 lbs class Virginia State records

?span style='mso-spacerun:yes'>?Squat, 180 lbs, Vienna 2005

?span style='mso-spacerun:yes'>?Bench Press, 130 lbs, Vienna 2005

?span style='mso-spacerun:yes'>?Deadlift, 230 lbs, Vienna 2005

?span style='mso-spacerun:yes'>?Total, 540 lbs, Vienna 2005

?span style='mso-spacerun:yes'>?Single Lift Bench, 130 lbs., Vienna 2005

Masters 45-49 105 lbs (48 kg) class National Bench Press Meet record

?span style='mso-spacerun:yes'>?57.5 kg, St. Louis 2005

Masters 50-54 105 lbs class American Records

?/span>?Raw Squat, 203.5 lbs, Gordonsville 2010

?/span>?Raw Deadlift, 275.5 lbs, Gordonsville 2010

?/span>?Raw Total, 605.25 lbs., Gordonsville 2010

Masters 50-54 105 lbs class Virginia State Records

?/span>?Squat, 200 lbs, Vienna 2006

?/span>?Bench Press, 130 lbs, Vienna 2006

?/span>?Deadlift, 250 lbs, Vienna 2006

?/span>?Total, 580 lbs. Vienna 2006

?/span>?Single Lift Bench, 130 lbs., Vienna 2006

?/span>?Raw Squat, 203.5 lbs, Gordonsville 2010

?/span>?Raw Bench, 126.75 lbs, St. Louis 2008

?/span>?Raw Deadlift, 275.5 lbs, Gordonsville 2010

?/span>?Raw Total, 605.25 lbs., Gordonsville 2010

Masters 50-54 105 lbs (48 kg) class National Bench Press Meet record

?/span>?57.5 kg, Denver 2006

Masters 50-54 105 lbs (48 kg) class National RAW Powerlifting Meet records

?/span>?Squat, 80 kg, St. Louis 2008

?/span>?Bench Press, 57.5 kg, St. Louis 2008

?/span>?Deadlift, 120 kg, St. Louis 2008

?/span>?Total, 257.5 kg, St. Louis 2008

Masters 55-59 105 lbs (48 kg) class American records

?/span>††?Deadlift, 253 lbs, Gordonsville, 2011

?span style='font:7.0pt "Times New Roman"'>        Raw squat, 80 kg, King of Prussia, 2013

?span style='font:7.0pt "Times New Roman"'>        Raw bench, 55 kg, King of Prussia, 2013

?span style='font:7.0pt "Times New Roman"'>        Raw deadlift, 115 kg, King of Prussia, 2013

?span style='font:7.0pt "Times New Roman"'>        Raw total, 250 kg, King of Prussia, 2013

 

 

World Natural Powerlifting Federation (WNPF)

Open RAW National records

?/span>?Bench Press, 130 lbs, Ephrata, Pa. 2008

?/span>?Deadlift, 265 lbs, Ephrata, Pa. 2008

Masters 50-59 RAW World records

?/span>?Squat 193 lbs, Atlantic City 2009

?/span>?Bench 126 lbs, Atlantic City 2009

?/span>?Deadlift 253 lbs, Atlantic City 2009

?/span>?Total 573 lbs, Atlantic City 2009

?/span>?Single lift bench 126 lbs, Atlantic City 2009

Masters 50-54 RAW National records

?/span>?Squat, 195 lbs, Ephrata, Pa. 2008

?/span>?Bench Press, 130 lbs, Ehprata, Pa. 2008

?/span>?Deadlift, 265 lbs, Ephrata, Pa. 2008

?/span>?Total, 590 lbs, Ephrata, Pa. 2008

Masters 50-54 RAW Bench Press records

?/span>?Bench Press, 130 lbs, Ephrata, Pa. 2008

 

100% RAW Powerlifting Federation

Open 105 class World Records

?/span>?Strict Curl, 74.9 lbs, Zion Crossroads, 2012

Masters 45-49 105 lbs class World Records

?/span>?Squat, 160 lbs, Sanford 2005

?/span>?Bench Press, 125 lbs, Sanford 2005

?/span>?Single Lift Bench, 125 lbs, Sanford 2005

Masters 50-54 105 lbs Class World Records

?/span>?Squat, 190 lbs, Zions Crossroads, 2009

?/span>?Bench, 130 lbs, Zions Crossroads, 2009

?/span>?Deadlift, 265 lbs, Zions Crossroads 2009

?/span>?Total, 585 lbs, Zions Crossroads 2009

?/span>?Single Lift Bench, 132.5 lbs, Currituck 2006

?/span>?Single Lift Deadlift, 260 lbs, Stanardsville, 2007

Masters 55-59 105lbs class World Records

?/span>?Squat, 198.4 lbs, Zion Crossroads, 2011

?/span>?Bench, 127.6 lbs, Zion Crossroads, 2013

?/span>?Dead Lift, 270 lbs, Zion Crossroads, 2011

?/span>?Strict Curl, 74.9 lbs, Zion Crossroads, 2012

 

World Association of Benchers and Deadlifters (WABDL)

Masters 47-53 105 lbs class World Records

?/span>?Deadlift, 286.5 lbs., Beaver Falls 2009

Masters 54-60 105 lbs class World Records

?/span>?Deadlift, 286.5 lbs., Lansing 2010

Masters 47-53 105 lbs Virginia State Records

?/span>?Bench, 133.5 lbs., Beaver Falls 2009

?/span>?Deadlift, 286.5 lbs., Beaver Falls 2009

Masters 54-60 105 lbs Virginia State Records

?/span>?Bench, 132.2 lbs., Lansing 2010

?/span>?Deadlift, 286.5 lbs., Lansing 2010

 

 

Her latest picture from the Outer Banks, on August 8, 2014.?Can anyone wear an itsy-bitsy, ridiculously expensive bikini at 58?

 

 

 

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Miscellaneous

Bison Chili

 

One 16 oz can of Garbanzo beans

One 16 oz can of Kidney beans

One 16 oz can of Black beans

 

Three 22 oz cans of tomato sauce

 

Three pounds free-range grass fed ground bison?

 

Six fizbits of cinnamon

Two fizbits of ginger

Four fizbits of oregano

Two fizbits of black pepper

Two fizbits of NoSalt

One fizbit of parsley flakes

One fizbit of red pepper

One fizbit of garlic powder

Three fizbits of chopped onion

 

For the curious, a fizbit is about three pinches, or two-thirds of a heckle.

 

Place bison burger in a pan quarter to half filled with water.?Cook until the water steams off, and the bison is barely crisped.?If you try to fry the bison like a burger, the leanness of the meat will cause it to end up like a hockey puck.?Shred and flake the bison before later adding it to the chili.

 

Combine the remaining ingredients in a large, hungry crock pot.?Stew in the crock pot on low for four hours.?Serve over one grand fallon of brown rice.? Feeds eight, if it turns out right; twelve if it doesnít.

 

Bison can be added after cooking, so that the bean base will last longer in the refrigerator.

 

Sprinkle a little parmesan cheese on top when served, if you feel adventurous.

 

 

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Unless otherwise annotated, all materials presented herein or herewith remain the property of Ken Poyner, and cannot be used without permission.